So, you want to write a short story, right? Well, let me tell you, it’s not like writing a novel. With a novel, you’ve got room to spread out, to meander a bit. But a short story? It’s intense. Every single word has to earn its spot. It needs to push the story forward, build characters, or deepen the meaning. It’s not just about keeping it short; it’s about being precise, making an impact, and being super efficient with your words. You’re not just telling a story; you’re building an experience, one perfect word at a time.
I’m going to break down how to really get your words working for you. We’ll go beyond the simple advice and get into real strategies with examples. Get ready to cut out the unnecessary stuff, sharpen your writing, and turn your short stories into these lean, powerful narratives that stick with the reader long after they’re done.
The Problem: Unnecessary Words – Let’s Get Rid of Them!
“Fluff” isn’t just about using too many words. It’s about words that actually weaken the good words. It drains the energy, waters down emotions, and slows everything down. Learning to spot it is step one.
Tip 1: Look for Adverbs and Adjectives (The Lazy Modifiers)
These aren’t always bad, but if you rely on them too much (like using lots of words ending in -ly, or too many describing words), it often means your main verbs and nouns aren’t strong enough. Great verbs and precise nouns show you what’s happening, they don’t just tell you.
- Fluffy Example: “She walked slowly and cautiously down the dark, shadowy hallway, feeling very afraid.”
- My thoughts: “Slowly” and “cautiously” tell us how she walked, but what if we picked a different verb that already implies that? “Dark” and “shadowy” are kind of redundant; hallways are usually dark, and shadows are kind of a given. “Very” almost never makes anything stronger. And “afraid” is just telling.
- Words Saved: 7!
- Better Version: “She crept down the oppressive hallway, dread coiling in her gut.”
- Why it’s better: “Crept” already suggests slowness and caution. “Oppressive” hints at darkness and shadows, and also gives you a feeling of how she perceives the place. “Dread coiling in her gut” shows us her fear internally, instead of just saying she’s afraid. This is way more evocative and to the point.
Tip 2: Cut Out Redundant Phrases (Saying the Same Thing Twice)
This is when you use extra words to say something that could be expressed with fewer. It’s often subtle, but it adds up!
- Common culprits: “true facts,” “past history,” “free gift,” “end result,” “sudden surprise.” See how the second word is already implied by the first?
- Fluffy Example: “He shrugged his shoulders in a dismissive manner.”
- My thoughts: Where else would someone shrug but their shoulders? And “in a dismissive manner” can be trimmed down.
- Words Saved: 4!
- Better Version: “He shrugged dismissively.”
- Why it’s better: Clearer, more direct.
Tip 3: Be Careful with Qualifiers and Intensifiers
Words like “just,” “very,” “really,” “quite,” “somewhat,” “a little bit,” “rather,” and “perhaps” often make your statement weaker, not stronger. They can often signal that you’re not fully committed to what you’re saying.
- Fluffy Example: “She was quite tired, and just wanted to rest a little bit.”
- My thoughts: “Quite,” “just,” and “a little bit” all dilute the impact.
- Words Saved: 5!
- Better Version: “She was exhausted; she needed rest.”
- Why it’s better: More definitive and impactful. “Exhausted” carries more weight than “quite tired.”
Being Precise: Getting More Out of Every Paragraph
It’s not just about having fewer sentences; it’s about packing as much information as possible into each one. Every grammar choice needs a purpose.
Tip 4: Use Active Voice (Most of the Time!)
Active voice is usually more direct, stronger, and requires fewer words because the subject is doing the action. Passive voice often needs more words and can hide who’s doing what.
- Fluffy Example (Passive): “The decision was made by the committee.”
- My thoughts: The committee is the one doing the action, but they’re at the end.
- Words Saved: 2!
- Better Version (Active): “The committee made the decision.”
- Why it’s better: More direct, punchier. Sometimes passive voice is useful (like if you don’t know who did something), but generally, active voice makes your writing smoother.
Tip 5: Turn Long Phrases into Shorter Ones, and Shorter Ones into Single Words
This is a more advanced technique. Look for places where you can condense information from a long phrase or clause into something much shorter.
- Fluffy Example (Longer Phrase): “The man, who was wearing a blue hat, entered the room.”
- My thoughts: That phrase can be shortened.
- Words Saved: 4!
- Better Version (Shorter Phrase): “The man in the blue hat entered the room.”
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Fluffy Example (Phrase): “He spoke in a very quiet voice.”
- My thoughts: That’s five words for what could be one!
- Words Saved: 4!
- Better Version (Single Word): “He spoke quietly.”
Tip 6: Combine Repetitive Ideas or Sentences
Read through your paragraphs and see if you’re repeating ideas or over-explaining things. Often, one well-written sentence can do the job of several.
- Fluffy Example: “He felt a deep sadness. It was a sadness that cut him to the core. He had never experienced such profound sorrow before.”
- My thoughts: All three sentences express the same idea of deep sadness.
- Words Saved: 12! Wow!
- Better Version: “Profound sorrow cut him to the core.”
- Why it’s better: Direct, powerful, and efficient.
Saying More with Less: Subtext and Implication
True word economy isn’t just about cutting words; it’s about implying information instead of stating it directly. This actually pulls the reader in more and adds deeper meaning.
Tip 7: Use Sensory Details, Don’t Just Explain
Instead of telling your reader how a character feels or what a place is like, show them through their senses – what they see, hear, smell, touch, taste. Let the reader figure it out.
- Fluffy Example (Explanation): “She was a very poor woman who lived in a bad neighborhood, and she was always struggling.”
- My thoughts: This just tells us everything. The reader doesn’t have to do any work.
- Words Saved: 10 (and the quality went way up!)
- Better Version (Sensory Detail): “Damp seeped through her threadbare coat. The corner smelled of stale urine and desperation. Another eviction notice fluttered on her door.”
- Why it’s better: This shows poverty, a tough neighborhood, and her struggles without ever using those exact words. It’s more immediate and impactful.
Tip 8: Use Character Action and Dialogue to Reveal, Not Just Narrate
What characters do and say (or don’t say!) is super powerful for revealing information. Don’t have your narrator say what can be shown.
- Fluffy Example (Narrated Emotion): “John was angry and frustrated about his situation, so he slammed the door.”
- My thoughts: “John was angry and frustrated about his situation” is telling. The door slam shows it.
- Words Saved: 7!
- Better Version (Action): “John slammed the door.”
- Why it’s better: The action speaks for itself. The reader understands his emotion.
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Fluffy Example (Narrated Conflict): “The two sisters didn’t get along anymore because of an old argument.”
- My thoughts: This tells us there’s conflict, but it’s not very specific or impactful.
- Words Saved: 10 (and we get a scene instead!)
- Better Version (Dialogue): “Lizzy reached for the last cookie. ‘Still taking everything, are we, Sarah?’ Sarah’s smile didn’t reach her eyes. ‘Some things never change.'”
- Why it’s better: This short exchange immediately creates tension and shows a strained relationship, implying past conflict without any direct explanation.
Tip 9: Use Figurative Language Smartly
Metaphors, similes, and other figures of speech can be incredible tools for packing a lot of meaning into a few words. But only use them if they add something specific and vivid that you can’t get any other way. And please, avoid clichés!
- Fluffy Example (Weak Simile): “His heart felt heavy, like a stone.” (This one is so common, it’s lost its punch)
- My thoughts: Brief, but a bit generic.
- Words Saved: 0 here, but a huge impact increase!
- Better Version (Precise Metaphor): “His heart was an anchor, dragging him to the seabed of despair.”
- Why it’s better: More specific, more vivid, and it feels more active. It doesn’t just say it’s heavy; it implies feeling trapped and sinking.
Treat Your Words Like Weapons: Refining Every Sentence
Beyond just cutting words, true skill involves crafting each word to have maximum weight and contribute to the story’s overall effect. This level of refinement requires being really tough on your own writing.
Tip 10: Make Your Sentences Flow and Impact
Varying your sentence length and structure creates rhythm and emphasis. Short, sharp sentences can build tension or urgency. Longer sentences can show complexity or give a sense of scope. Breaking your pattern will grab attention.
- Inefficient Example: “He went to the door. He opened the door. He walked out of the house. The rain was falling.” (Choppy, repetitive)
- My thoughts: The repetition of “door” and “he” is awkward. Those short sentences aren’t really serving a purpose here.
- Words Saved: At least 4!
- Better Version: “He opened the door and stepped into the falling rain.”
- Why it’s better: Combines actions, flows better, and is more immersive.
Tip 11: Read Aloud – Your Best Fluff Detector!
Your ears are amazing editors. Reading your story out loud forces you to notice awkward phrasing, repeated words, and sentences that just feel too heavy. If it sounds clunky, it probably is.
- How to do it: Print your story. Read it slowly, word by word, out loud. Mark every single place where you stumble, run out of breath, or a phrase just doesn’t sound right. Those are usually the spots that need fixing.
- What you might notice: Reading aloud, you might hear: “She felt an intense wave of relief come over her.”
- My thoughts: “Felt an intense wave of relief come over her” is a mouthful.
- Better Version: “Relief flooded her.” (More direct and active)
Tip 12: Be Ruthless with Dialogue
Real people rarely speak in perfect, exposition-heavy sentences. Dialogue is a goldmine for saving words, revealing character, and moving the plot along efficiently.
- Fluffy Example (Expository Dialogue): “‘As you know, Bob, our mission objective is to infiltrate the enemy base located north of the river and retrieve the stolen plans to prevent catastrophe.'”
- My thoughts: Nobody talks like that. It’s too much explanation, delivered awkwardly.
- Words Saved: 18!
- Better Version (Natural Dialogue + Action): ” ‘Base, north of the river?’ Bob adjusted his grip on the rifle. ‘Plans?’ Jane nodded grimly. ‘Catastrophe.'”
- Why it’s better: Way more realistic, terse, and impactful. The unspoken details are implied, and the reader connects the dots. The characters’ actions or minimal responses fill in the gaps.
The Final Polish: Perfecting Every Syllable
After identifying and condensing, the last step is about incredibly careful refinement. Every phrase, every word choice, has to be able to stand up to scrutiny.
Tip 13: Question Every Word – The “Why Is This Here?” Test
Go through your manuscript line by line, word by word, and ask yourself: “Does this word need to be here? What purpose does it serve? If I take it out, does the meaning change or get weaker?” If the answer is no, then it probably doesn’t belong.
- Example: “He walked around the large, old oak tree slowly.”
- My thoughts: “Around the large, old” are descriptors. Do we need all of them?
- Words Saved: 3!
- Actionable Revision: “He walked around the ancient oak slowly.”
- Why it’s better: “Ancient” implies both large and old, and it’s a stronger descriptor. Keep “slowly” if the pace is really important; otherwise, you could use a verb that implies slowness like “circumnavigated.”
Tip 14: Use Specific Nouns and Verbs Instead of General Ones with Modifiers
This connects back to the adverb/adjective rule, but it applies to your noun and verb choices too.
- Vague: “He made his way to the finish line quickly.” (General verb, adverb)
- Specific: “He sprinted to the finish line.” (Stronger, specific verb)
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Vague: “There was a nice smell in the kitchen.” (General noun, vague adjective)
- Specific: “The kitchen fragrant with baking bread.” (Stronger, more evocative)
Tip 15: Trust Your Reader – They’re Smart!
Your reader isn’t a dummy. Trust them to figure things out, to understand emotion from action, to grasp a setting from a few carefully chosen details. You don’t need to explain everything. The less you spoon-feed them, the more engaged they’ll become.
- Overexplanation Example: “She hated him so much. Her face was contorted with anger, and her hands were clenched into fists, trembling with rage, because of all the terrible things he had done to her in the past.”
- My thoughts: Too much telling, too much stating the obvious after showing.
- Better Version: “Her face, a mask of fury, contorted as her trembling fists clenched. He was here.” (The last sentence provides context and focus, letting the reader connect her anger to him and infer their past.)
The Whole Point of Word Economy
Making every word count isn’t about arbitrary word limits or refusing to use beautiful language. It’s about maximizing your impact. It’s about being clear, precise, and using the powerful force of suggestion. When every word works for your story, the narrative feels tighter, emotions are sharper, and the reader’s experience is deeply immersive. This relentless pursuit of economy changes your short story from just a retelling into a meticulously crafted work of art, where silence can speak volumes and one phrase can spark a whole universe of meaning. Master this, and your short stories won’t just be read; they’ll be felt, remembered, and read again and again.