How to Show Character, Don’t Tell
The bedrock of compelling storytelling isn’t just a captivating plot; it’s the characters who breathe life into that plot. Yet, one of the most common pitfalls for writers, both aspiring and experienced, is the tendency to tell us about their characters rather than letting us experience them. We’re often informed that a character is “brave,” “intelligent,” or “kind,” but never truly shown the bravery in action, the wheels of their intellect turning, or the subtle gestures of their kindness. This is the fundamental difference between telling and showing, and mastering the latter is the secret to creating unforgettable characters who resonate deeply with your readers.
Showing character isn’t a mere stylistic flourish; it’s a strategic narrative choice that engages your audience on an emotional and intellectual level. When you show, you invite readers to deduce, to interpret, and to participate actively in the character’s journey. They don’t just passively receive information; they become detectives, piecing together personality traits from observations, actions, dialogue, and even internal thoughts. This active engagement fosters empathy, builds suspense, and ultimately creates a more immersive and believable world.
This comprehensive guide will demystify the art of showing character, offering practical, actionable strategies and concrete examples to help you elevate your storytelling. We’ll dismantle the common misconceptions, explore the myriad techniques at your disposal, and equip you with the tools to craft characters that leap off the page and into your readers’ hearts.
The Problem with Telling: Why It Falls Flat
Before delving into the how-to, it’s crucial to understand why telling is detrimental to your narrative. Telling is a shortcut, a narrative bypass that robs your reader of discovery.
Imagine being told: “Eleanor was a very sad woman.” This statement is efficient, but also inert. It gives you information, but no feeling, no image, no connection. You don’t understand why she’s sad, what her sadness looks like, or how it manifests in her life. The reader remains an observer, detached and uninvested.
Conversely, consider: “Eleanor stared at the chipped teacup, tracing the hairline fracture with a trembling finger. The afternoon light, usually a golden comfort, seemed only to highlight the dust motes dancing in the empty space where laughter once echoed.” Here, we don’t need to be told Eleanor is sad. We see her stillness, her focus on a small, imperfect object, the contrast between the light and her inner emptiness. We infer her sadness, and crucially, we feel it.
Telling makes characters feel generic and interchangeable. If every “brave” character is simply labeled brave, without demonstration, they blend into a homogenous mass. Showing, however, imbues each character with unique mannerisms, reactions, and internal landscapes, making them distinct and memorable. Furthermore, telling can often come across as preachy or manipulative, as if the author is dictating how the reader should perceive the character, rather than allowing for organic interpretation.
The Core Principle: Reveal Through Action, Reaction, and Interaction
The fundamental principle of showing character boils down to this: reveal who a character is through what they do, how they react to situations, and how they interact with others and their environment. These elements are the building blocks of character exposition.
Let’s break down the various facets of this principle:
1. Actions Speak Louder Than Adjectives
A character’s actions are the most direct and potent indicators of their personality, motivations, and beliefs. What a character chooses to do, especially under pressure, reveals their true nature.
An “honest” character doesn’t just profess honesty; they return a dropped wallet, even when no one is watching. A “generous” character doesn’t simply claim generosity; they offer their last meal to a starving stranger.
Example:
Telling: “Mark was very cautious.”
Showing: “Mark approached the creaking floorboard, his hand instinctively reaching for the worn banister. He tested each step with the ball of his foot before committing his full weight, his eyes scanning the ancient architecture for any signs of instability.”
Here, Mark’s cautiousness isn’t stated but vividly demonstrated through his physical movements and attention to detail. This also subtly hints at a methodical nature or perhaps a past experience that warrants such carefulness.
Actionable Tip: For every character trait you want to convey, brainstorm a specific, concrete action that exemplifies it. Not just an action, but the action that most powerfully and uniquely illustrates that trait. Consider the stakes involved in that action – higher stakes often reveal more profound truths about a character.
2. Reactions: The Unfiltered Response
How a character reacts to unexpected events, challenges, or even minor annoyances provides a window into their emotional landscape, resilience, and underlying temperament. Reactions are often instinctive and less filtered than deliberate actions, making them particularly revealing.
A “stoic” character doesn’t just bear bad news; their jaw might clench imperceptibly, their gaze hardening, but their voice remains level. A “hot-headed” character doesn’t just get angry; they might slam a fist on a table, their face flushing, their words erupting in a torrent.
Example:
Telling: “Sarah was easily flustered.”
Showing: “When the barista accidentally spilled coffee on Sarah’s crisp white shirt, her eyes widened, and a small gasp escaped her lips. Her hands fluttered uselessly at her sides as she stared at the brown stain, a faint flush creeping up her neck.”
We don’t need to be told Sarah is easily flustered; her physical reactions — widened eyes, gasp, useless hands, flushing — paint a clear picture.
Actionable Tip: Put your characters in situations where their ideal traits are challenged, or their flaws are exposed. How do they react under pressure? How do they cope with success or failure? The more varied the situations, the fuller the picture of their reactive personality. Consider emotional, physical, and verbal reactions.
3. Dialogue: More Than Just Words
Dialogue is a gold mine for character depiction, but it’s not just about what characters say, but how they say it, what they don’t say, and the subtext beneath their words.
Voice and Vocabulary: A character’s vocabulary, sentence structure, and prevalent idioms reveal their background, education, and social standing. A gruff, working-class character will speak differently from an eloquent, aristocratic scholar.
Example:
Telling: “The lawyer was very articulate and precise.”
Showing: ” ‘Lest there be any misapprehension regarding the parameters of the defendant’s culpability,’ the lawyer intoned, selecting each word with the surgical precision of an expert craftsman, ‘we must elucidate the nuanced distinctions inherent in the evidentiary protocols.'”
The lawyer’s precise, formal language immediately communicates their profession and meticulous nature without needing explicit descriptors.
Subtext and Unspoken Meanings: What a character doesn’t say can be as powerful as what they do. Are they evasive? Do they change the subject? Do they use passive-aggressive language? These choices reveal fear, insecurity, manipulation, or unspoken desires.
Example:
Telling: “David was insecure.”
Showing: ” ‘Oh, I just threw it together,’ David mumbled, glancing away as his friend praised his intricate carving. He picked at a loose thread on his sleeve, avoiding eye contact.”
David’s dismissal of praise, his mumbled response, and his avoidance of eye contact all subtly demonstrate his insecurity, even as his friend offers a compliment.
Contradictions and Hypocrisy: What a character says can contradict what they do, revealing hypocrisy, self-deception, or a struggle with their own ideals.
Actionable Tip: Read your dialogue aloud. Does it sound authentic to the character? Does it reveal something about them beyond the literal meaning of the words? Experiment with slang, regionalisms, idiosyncratic phrases, or even speech impediments to further individualize voices. Consider the power dynamics within conversations and how they influence what is said and left unsaid.
4. Internal Monologue: The Unfiltered Mind
While often considered “telling” if mishandled, internal monologue can be a powerful showing tool when used to reveal a character’s unfiltered thoughts, biases, fears, and judgments. It’s the raw, unedited stream of consciousness that shapes their perception of the world.
The key is to make it specific, personal, and connected to the character’s unique way of thinking, rather than a generic summary of their feelings.
Example:
Telling: “She was afraid of failure.”
Showing: “A bead of sweat trickled down Amelia’s temple. This is it, she thought, her stomach doing a slow, sickening flip. One wrong move and everything comes crashing down. They’ll laugh. They’ll point. I’ll never live it down. Her breath hitched, shallow and ragged.”
Here, Amelia’s internal monologue isn’t just about fear; it reveals the specific nature of her fear (public humiliation, judgment) and the catastrophic thinking associated with it. The physical manifestation of sweat and shallow breathing grounds the internal fear in a tangible reality.
Actionable Tip: Use internal monologue to reveal a character’s biases, their decision-making process, their coping mechanisms, or the internal conflicts they face. It’s particularly effective for showing disconnect between a character’s outward presentation and their inner world. Don’t simply state an emotion; show the thought process that leads to or is fueled by that emotion.
5. Appearance and Physicality: Silent Cues
A character’s appearance, mannerisms, gait, and even the way they dress can convey volumes about them without a single word of direct description. These details are often interpreted instinctively by readers.
Clothing Choices: Clothes reflect personality, social status, profession, and even mood. A hastily thrown-on tracksuit suggests a casual or rushed nature, while meticulously ironed couture speaks of fastidiousness or a need for external validation.
Example:
Telling: “He was a sloppy person.”
Showing: “His shirt, stained with what looked suspiciously like last night’s spaghetti, hung untucked over frayed jeans. One shoelace dangled precariously, almost tripping him as he shuffled across the floor, leaving a faint trail of cookie crumbs.”
The dishevelled appearance, the stains, the untied shoelace, and the cookie crumbs all combine to show a person who is not particularly concerned with tidiness or appearances.
Physical Mannerisms: Twitches, nervous habits, posture, and gestures are physical manifestations of inner states. A constant hair-twirling might suggest anxiety, while a habitually slumped posture could indicate defeat or disinterest.
Example:
Telling: “She was nervous.”
Showing: “Her fingers worried the seam of her skirt, twisting the fabric until it threatened to unravel. Her gaze darted around the room, settling briefly on each face before flitting away, never holding steady.”
The fidgeting, the nervous gaze – these are direct, observable actions that show her nervousness.
Actionable Tip: Don’t just list physical attributes. Consider how a character carries themselves. Does their posture slouch or stand tall? Are their movements fluid or jerky? Do they make eye contact readily or avoid it? Choose specific, evocative details that contribute to a larger impression, rather than overwhelming the reader with a laundry list of features. Ensure these details are woven naturally into the narrative fabric, rather than presented as a standalone paragraph of description.
6. Environment and Possessions: Extensions of Self
The places a character inhabits and the objects they choose to surround themselves with can profoundly reflect their personality, priorities, and values. We curate our spaces, and those choices, conscious or unconscious, communicate who we are.
Home Environment: Is their home meticulously organized or chaotically cluttered? Is it filled with cherished mementos or sparse and impersonal? These choices speak volumes about their internal world.
Example:
Telling: “He was a sentimental man.”
Showing: “Professor Aris’s study smelled faintly of aged paper and pipe tobacco. Every surface groaned under the weight of books, their spines cracked and annotated. A single, tarnished silver locket, almost swallowed by a stack of ancient maps, rested beside a half-finished cryptogram on his desk, a testament to unsolved mysteries and long-held memories.”
The smell, the books, the tarnished locket – these details, especially the locket amidst the academic chaos, paint a picture of a man deeply connected to history and personal artifacts.
Prized Possessions: What does a character value? A chipped ceramic mug they’ve owned for decades might suggest practicality and adherence to comfort, while a pristine, expensive watch could point to materialism or a need for status.
Actionable Tip: Consider your character’s living space, their workspace, and the contents of their bag or pockets. What do these everyday items reveal about their habits, their aspirations, their past, or their current state of mind? Even the absence of certain items can be revealing.
7. How Others React to Them: The Reflection Effect
A powerful, indirect way to show character is through how other characters perceive and react to them. We often form opinions of people based on how others behave around them.
Example:
Telling: “The queen was intimidating.”
Showing: “As the queen entered the hall, a hush fell over the assembled courtiers. Heads bowed, eyes fixed on the ornate patterns of the marble floor. Not a single whisper marred the silence until she had taken her throne, and even then, conversations resumed in a subdued murmur, punctuated by nervous glances in her direction.”
The silence, the bowed heads, the nervous glances – these are the reactions of others that clearly communicate the queen’s intimidating presence and authority.
Actionable Tip: Observe how your secondary characters respond to the protagonist. Do they defer to them? Are they openly dismissive? Do they seek their comfort or advice? These interactions provide external validation or contradiction of your character’s traits. Be subtle; let the reactions speak for themselves rather than explicitly stating the secondary character’s opinion.
Combining Techniques for Richer Portrayal
The true power of showing character lies in the synergistic effect of combining these techniques. Seldom will a single method suffice to fully flesh out a complex individual. Instead, layers upon layers of action, dialogue, reaction, internal thought, and environmental cues build a multifaceted portrait.
Consider a character who is “stubborn.”
- Action: They refuse to concede a point in an argument, even when presented with overwhelming evidence. They continue working on a task long after others have given up, despite setbacks.
- Reaction: When faced with opposition, their jaw sets, and their eyes narrow, but they don’t retreat.
- Dialogue: They repeatedly use phrases like, “I’m not changing my mind,” or “That’s how it’s always been done.”
- Internal Monologue: They think I’m wrong, but I know I’m right. I just need to find the proof. I won’t give up until I prove it.
- Appearance: Their posture might be rigidly upright, their movements decisive.
- Environment: Perhaps their workspace is cluttered with partially completed projects they refuse to abandon.
- Others’ Reactions: Other characters might sigh exasperatedly in their presence or avoid engaging them in debates.
Each piece of the puzzle reinforces the trait, creating a vivid and consistent characterization that the reader discovers and understands on a deeper level.
Avoiding Common Pitfalls: Nuance and Trust
While the mandate is to show, not tell, blindly applying this rule can lead to clunky prose or insufficient information. Here are crucial considerations for nuanced application:
1. The Right Amount of Telling – Sometimes it’s Necessary
Strategic telling, used sparingly and effectively, can be a valuable tool. Sometimes, a succinct piece of information is needed to move the plot forward or provide immediate context without bogging down the narrative with excessive showing.
When to tell:
- To provide general background information quickly: “He had lived in the city for twenty years.” (No need to show every single year.)
- To state facts that don’t need elaborate demonstration: “She was a doctor.” (Her actions as a doctor will show her competence and compassion, but the profession itself is a fact.)
- To summarize a character’s general emotional state over a longer period: “A deep sadness had settled over him in the months following her departure.” (You’d then show specific instances of that sadness, but the general statement sets the scene.)
The key is that any telling should be a springboard for further showing, or it should resolve an informational gap efficiently. It should never substitute for crucial character revelation that impacts reader engagement.
2. Trust Your Reader: The Power of Subtlety
One of the greatest fears for writers is that their readers won’t “get” it. This leads to over-explanation and explicit labeling. Trust your reader’s intelligence. Provide the clues, and let them connect the dots. The satisfaction of discovery is a powerful engagement tool.
Example of lack of trust:
“He was an intelligent man. His sharp mind quickly grasped the complex theory, which showed how smart he was.” (Repetitive telling.)
Example of trust:
“He flipped through the complex mathematical proofs, muttering to himself, ‘Ah, so that’s where they went wrong. A simple miscalculation of the third derivative.’ He tapped his pen against the page, a slow smile spreading across his face as he scribbled corrections in the margin.”
We don’t need to be told he’s intelligent; his immediate identification of a complex error and his focused thought process demonstrate it.
3. Varying the Pacing and Detail
Not every single character beat needs an elaborate showing sequence. Some moments require a quick sketch, others a detailed portrait. Vary your approach. Sometimes a subtle gesture is enough; other times, a prolonged scene is necessary to fully illustrate a character’s depth or internal struggle.
4. Authenticity and Consistency
Ensure that your character’s actions, reactions, and dialogue are consistent with the traits you are trying to convey. Inconsistencies can break immersion. However, characters can also evolve, and showing that evolution through changing actions and reactions is a powerful narrative device. The key is that any change should feel earned and motivated, not arbitrary.
The Iterative Process: Write, Observe, Refine
Mastering “show, don’t tell” isn’t a one-time fix; it’s an iterative process that permeates every stage of writing and revision.
- Draft with Freedom: In your initial draft, focus on getting the story down. Don’t censor yourself too much if you find yourself telling.
- Identify Telling: During revision, actively search for instances of telling. Highlight every adjective used to describe a character’s personality. Ask yourself: Can I show this instead?
- Brainstorm Showing Techniques: For each instance of telling, brainstorm specific actions, reactions, dialogue snippets, or environmental details that would convey the same information visually or experientially.
- Integrate and Weave: Don’t just tack on showing moments. Weave them organically into the narrative. How can a character’s “bravery” be woven into a scene where they face danger, rather than stated upfront?
- Read Aloud: Reading your work aloud helps you catch clunky phrasing and identify where you might be repeating yourself or stating the obvious.
- Seek Feedback: Ask trusted critique partners to identify instances where they feel “told” about a character rather than shown. Their fresh perspective can be invaluable.
Conclusion: Crafting Living, Breathing Characters
Showing character isn’t just a rule to follow; it’s an art form, a philosophy of storytelling. It requires a keen eye for human behavior, an ear for authentic dialogue, and a willingness to trust your reader. When you commit to showing, you move beyond simply describing your characters; you begin to create them.
The effort is repaid manifold. Your characters will possess depth, nuance, and genuine believability. Readers will not merely know about them, but will truly know them, feeling their joys, their sorrows, and their struggles as if they were their own. This empathetic connection is the hallmark of truly powerful fiction, and it’s built, brick by painstaking brick, by showing, not telling. Embrace the challenge, hone your observational skills, and watch your characters transform from flat archetypes into living, breathing entities who will linger in the reader’s mind long after the final page is turned.