Every compelling story hinges on its characters. But it’s not enough to simply state that a character is brave, or kind, or cruel. Readers don’t connect with adjectives; they connect with experiences. They need to feel the bravery, witness the kindness, and flinch from the cruelty. This is the essence of “show, don’t tell” when it comes to character traits – a fundamental principle for any writer striving for depth and impact.
Telling is a shortcut, a narrative fiat. “Jane was a very clever woman.” Okay, but how? What did she do that demonstrated her cleverness? Showing is immersive. It draws the reader in, allowing them to participate in the discovery of your characters. It treats your reader not as a passive recipient of information, but as an active observer, forming their own conclusions based on the evidence you provide. This active engagement creates a richer, more memorable reading experience, building trust between the author and the audience. When you show, you respect your reader’s intelligence, inviting them to deduce rather than dictating to them. This guide will dismantle the concept of “show, don’t tell” for character traits into actionable strategies, providing concrete examples that illuminate the path from abstract declaration to vivid portrayal.
The Pitfalls of Telling: Why It Weakens Your Narrative
Stating a character trait feels efficient, but it’s deceptively so. It robs your reader of agency and enjoyment. Imagine being told a joke’s punchline without the setup; it falls flat. Similarly, being told a character trait without the accompanying demonstration leaves your reader feeling uninvestigated, disinterested.
Lack of Engagement: When you tell, the reader is a passive recipient. There’s no mystery, no discovery. They aren’t working to figure things out, and human brains are wired for problem-solving. This passivity breeds boredom.
Weak Characterization: Told traits often feel generic. “He was brave” could apply to countless characters. There’s no unique flavor, no nuance. Showing allows for the complexities and contradictions that make characters feel real.
Undermining Credibility: If you say a character is brilliant but they act foolishly, you’ve broken the reader’s trust. Showing builds a consistent, believable character arc.
Missed Opportunities for Sensory Details: Telling abstracts the experience. Showing grounds it in the physical world – sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures. These sensory details are the bedrock of immersive storytelling. “She was angry” tells. “Her knuckles turned white as she gripped the steering wheel, a low growl rumbling in her chest” shows, and also conveys the intensity of that anger through physical manifestation.
The Cornerstones of Showing: Where to Begin
Showing character traits isn’t about lengthy descriptions; it’s about strategic placement of details that imply, rather than explicitly state. It permeates every aspect of your character’s existence within your narrative.
Dialogue: The Voice of the Soul
Dialogue is perhaps the most direct avenue for revealing character, second only to their actions. It’s not just what a character says, but how they say it, and importantly, what they choose not to say.
Word Choice and Vocabulary:
* Telling: “He was uneducated.”
* Showing: “He squinted at the menu, muttering, ‘What in tarnation is ‘hors d’oeuvres’?'” (Reveals his lack of exposure to certain cultural norms or formal education.)
* Telling: “She was highly intelligent and well-read.”
* Showing: ” ‘Frankly, the existential implications of quantum entanglement make for rather compelling dinner party conversation,’ she mused, swirling her wine.” (Her vocabulary, her choice of topic, her casualness about complex concepts all reflect intellect.)
Sentence Structure and Rhythm:
* Telling: “He was impatient.”
* Showing: ” ‘Spit it out, already, before I die of old age,’ he snapped, cutting her off midsentence.” (Short, sharp sentences, interruptions convey impatience.)
* Telling: “She was hesitant.”
* Showing: “She cleared her throat, ‘Well, um, I suppose… if you’re quite sure…’ Her words trailed off, a faint blush creeping up her neck.” (Filler words, hesitations, incomplete sentences, and the physical manifestation of a blush all reveal timidity or uncertainty.)
Accent, Dialect, and Idiosyncrasies: These add authenticity and specificity to a character’s background and personality.
* Telling: “He was from the South.”
* Showing: ” ‘Bless your heart,’ he drawled, his voice thick with a molasses-like slowness that could only come from generations below the Mason-Dixon.” (The specific phrase, the aural description of the drawl, all point to his regional origin.)
What They Discuss (or Avoid Discussing): A character’s conversational priorities are incredibly telling.
* Telling: “He was vain.”
* Showing: ” ‘Did you see the way my hair caught the light in that last selfie? Utter perfection,’ he preened, completely ignoring the news report about the impending hurricane.” (His focus on his appearance during a crisis highlights vanity and self-absorption.)
* Telling: “She was secretive.”
* Showing: When asked about her past, she would simply say, “That’s a story for another time,” her gaze always drifting to the window, changing the topic with a practiced ease that bordered on evasion. (Her refusal to engage, the evasive gaze, the swift change of subject.)
Actions: Behavior Speaks Louder Than Words
What a character does is the bedrock of showing. Actions are undeniable. They are the most powerful evidence you can present to your reader about who a character truly is.
Reactions to Conflict or Pressure: How a character behaves when the stakes are high reveals their true nature.
* Telling: “He was cowardly.”
* Showing: “The growl echoed from the dark alley. His immediate response was to shove his smaller companion forward, then turn and sprint in the opposite direction without a backward glance.” (His prioritizing his own safety over others, and his flight response.)
* Telling: “She was resilient.”
* Showing: “Even after her business collapsed, she was at the library every morning before dawn, devouring books on marketing and coding, a grim determination etched on her face as she typed late into the night.” (Her persistent effort despite setbacks, her proactive learning.)
Habits and Routines: Repetitive behaviors provide consistent insights into personality.
* Telling: “He was meticulous.”
* Showing: “Every evening, before bed, he would meticulously arrange his books by author, then publication date, carefully ensuring each spine was in perfect alignment, a ruler often employed for absolute precision.” (The specific, detailed routine, the use of a ruler, all highlight his meticulous nature.)
* Telling: “She was disorganized.”
* Showing: “Her desk was a archaeological dig of half-eaten granola bars, crumpled receipts, and unread memos, each layer seemingly older and more chaotic than the last.” (The visual chaos of her personal space.)
Physical Gestures and Body Language: Non-verbal cues are powerful indicators of internal states.
* Telling: “He was nervous.”
* Showing: “His left eye twitched uncontrollably. His hands, shoved deep into his pockets, clinked faintly, revealing the loose change he was nervously fidgeting with.” (The eye twitch, the fidgeting hands.)
* Telling: “She was confident.”
* Showing: “She strode into the room, shoulders back, head held high, her gaze meeting every challenging stare with an unwavering intensity. She took the seat at the head of the table without hesitation.” (Posture, direct gaze, confident action.)
Choices and Decisions: The choices a character makes, especially moral or difficult ones, define them.
* Telling: “He was selfless.”
* Showing: “Given the choice between taking the last ration of food for himself or secretly leaving it for the ailing child, he left it, pretending to have eaten already, despite his own gnawing hunger.” (His conscious decision to sacrifice his own needs for another, and his desire to do so without recognition.)
* Telling: “She was opportunistic.”
* Showing: “When the company announced layoffs, she immediately began compiling a detailed, anonymous report highlighting her colleague’s minor inefficiencies, submitting it just hours before the severance packages were distributed.” (Her calculated action to benefit from others’ misfortune.)
Internal Monologue: The Unfiltered Mind
While “show, don’t tell” often implies external manifestation, internal monologue (what a character is thinking) is a crucial tool. It’s direct access to their fears, desires, biases, and rationale. It’s not telling if it’s the character telling themselves (and by extension, the reader) something. The key is to make this internal voice unique and revealing.
Character’s Interpretation of Events: How a character processes the world around them.
* Telling: “She was cynical.”
* Showing: Another charity plea. Right, like dropping five bucks into this bucket will solve systemic poverty. It’s just guilt-tripping for the privileged. What they really want is my contact info for more spam. (Her internal, jaded interpretation of a common event reflects cynicism.)
* Telling: “He was paranoid.”
* Showing: Why did the barista pause just before handing over the coffee? Was he checking for something? Could they have bugged the cup? No, that’s absurd. Or is it? Better take a different route home. (His internal questioning, suspicion, and subsequent protective action.)
Recurring Thoughts and Obsessions: What consumes a character’s mind.
* Telling: “She was ambitious.”
* Showing: If I can just land this account, then the promotion is practically guaranteed. Then the corner office. No, not just corner, top floor. Then the whole division. Maybe even the CEO one day. (Her internal trajectory of escalating aspirations.)
Reflections and Self-Correction: How a character learns or struggles with their own flaws.
* Telling: “He was trying to be more empathetic.”
* Showing: I really messed that up. I just needed to listen, not jump in with solutions. Dad always did that. Is that why I do it? Must remember to just shut up and listen next time. Just listen. (His self-awareness of a failing, his struggle to change, and the historical root of the behavior.)
Description (Sensory Details and Environment): The World as a Mirror
A character’s environment, the way they interact with it, and the details used to describe them or their surroundings can subtly yet powerfully reveal their traits.
Appearance: Not just physical attributes, but how they present themselves.
* Telling: “She was messy.”
* Showing: “Her hair was a perpetual bird’s nest, and she often sported mismatched socks, seemingly unaware or unconcerned by the colorful rebellion on her feet.” (Specific details of her untidiness, demonstrating a lack of concern for conventional presentation.)
* Telling: “He was meticulous.”
* Showing: “His shirts were always ironed to an almost aggressive crispness, creaseless suits hung perfectly, and not a single hair dared to stray from its precisely parted line.” (The extreme precision of his grooming.)
Possessions and Surroundings: A character’s space often reflects their interior world.
* Telling: “She was artistic.”
* Showing: “Her cramped studio apartment overflowed with vibrant canvases, tubes of paint stained every surface, and even the air hummed with the faint, sweet scent of turpentine and linseed oil.” (The artistic tools, the inherent messiness because of her art, the sensory details of her creative endeavors.)
* Telling: “He was frugal.”
* Showing: “His apartment was sparse, Spartan even. A single, bare bulb hung from the ceiling, and the sofa, clearly a hand-me-down from the 70s, sagged in the middle. His only luxuries seemed to be the precisely organized stacks of coupons on his coffee table.” (The lack of comfort, the focus on practical, dated items, and the specific detail of coupons.)
Sensory Responses: How a character reacts to stimuli.
* Telling: “She was sensitive to loud noises.”
* Showing: “The sudden blare of the car horn made her flinch violently, her entire body tensing as she pressed her hands tightly over her ears, a faint whimper escaping her lips.” (The physical reaction, the auditory avoidance, the vocalization of distress.)
* Telling: “He was resilient (physically).”
* Showing: “He shrugged off the searing pain in his arm as if it were a minor inconvenience, his focus entirely on fixing the broken engine, gritting his teeth but never faltering in his task.” (His ability to continue despite physical discomfort, his mental fortitude.)
Nuance and Subtlety: The Art of Layering
Great characterization isn’t about revealing everything at once. It’s about accumulating small details, creating a mosaic of a personality. Characters, like people, are rarely one-dimensional. They possess contradictions, evolving traits, and hidden layers.
Contradictory Details: Adding Depth
Characters are most compelling when they defy simple categorization. A “brave” character might have a secret fear, or a “kind” one might harbor a deep-seated resentment. These contradictions make them feel real.
* Telling (Simple): “He was a bully.”
* Showing (Complex): He relished taunting the weaker kids, a cruel smirk always on his face. But at home, he meticulously cared for his elderly, ailing grandmother, reading her stories with a gentle cadence and patiently helping her with her meals. (The juxtaposition of cruelty in one context and tenderness in another creates a more complex, believable character than a simple “bully.”)
Gradual Revelation: The Unfolding Character
Don’t dump all the information about a character in one go. Let their traits unfold naturally through the narrative. Each scene, each interaction, offers an opportunity to add another brushstroke to their portrait.
* Initially, you might show a character as highly competent and in control. Later, you could reveal their underlying anxiety through internal monologue or subtle physical tells when under immense pressure. This makes the competence feel earned and the character more human.
The Impact of Other Characters: Reflection and Contrast
How other characters react to, describe, or interact with your character can also show their traits from an external perspective.
* Telling: “She was inspiring.”
* Showing: “When she spoke, people leaned forward, captivated. Even the most cynical among them found themselves nodding along, a flicker of hope illuminating their faces they hadn’t known they possessed.” (The effect she has on others, their reactions to her presence.)
* Telling: “He was disliked.”
* Showing: “A hush fell over the room the moment he entered, conversations dying, not in respect, but a palpable awkwardness. People found reasons to look at their shoes or suddenly remember urgent errands, anything to avoid making eye contact.” (The collective reaction of avoidance and discomfort.)
Common Traps to Avoid
Even with the best intentions, it’s easy to slip back into telling. Be vigilant.
The “As You Can See” Trap: Directly explaining your character’s traits after showing them. Trust your reader. If you’ve shown it effectively, they’ll get it.
* Bad Example: “She slammed the door, her face a mask of fury. As you can see, she was incredibly angry.”
The “Adverbial Overload” Trap: Relying too heavily on adverbs to convey traits when stronger verbs or actions would be more effective.
* Telling: “He walked lazily.”
* Showing: “He shuffled, his feet barely leaving the ground, as if each step were a monumental effort against gravity.”
The “Just Knew” Trap: Implying knowledge of a trait without demonstrating the acquisition of that knowledge.
* Telling: “Everyone knew he was devious.”
* Showing: “Whispers followed him like shadows. Doors clicked shut when he approached. No one could pinpoint a specific instance, but the way he’d subtly redirect conversations, the way his eyes always seemed to be calculating… people just stopped trusting him.” (The collective societal reaction and the small, observed behaviors lead to the conclusion, rather than it being an unearned “knowing.”)
The “Exposition Dump” Trap: Inserting large blocks of narrative prose dedicated solely to describing a character’s personality. Weave it into the story naturally.
The Iterative Process: Rewrite, Refine, Re-Show
Showing isn’t a one-and-done process. It’s an iterative refinement.
- Identify Told Traits: Go through your manuscript and highlight every instance where you’ve told the reader something about your character’s personality (“He was kind,” “She was courageous,” etc.).
- Brainstorm Actions/Dialogue/Thoughts: For each highlighted trait, brainstorm specific, concrete ways that character could demonstrate that trait. Think about:
- What would they do in a specific situation?
- What would they say?
- What would they think?
- What physical reactions would they have?
- How would others react to them?
- Integrate and Weave: Don’t just tack on a single example. Look for opportunities to weave these demonstrations throughout multiple scenes and interactions, allowing the trait to build organically.
- Cut the Telling: Once you’ve successfully shown the trait, ruthlessly delete the original telling sentence or phrase.
- Read Aloud: This helps catch instances where the telling still lingers or where the showing feels clunky.
The Long Game: Character Arc Through Showing
Finally, “show, don’t tell” is also critical for demonstrating character development. If a character changes over the course of your story, that change needs to be shown through their shifting actions, dialogue, internal thoughts, and how they interact with their world.
* Telling: “He learned to be more compassionate.”
* Showing: Initial scene: He walks past a homeless person, eyes fixed straight ahead, muttering about societal problems. Later scene: He pauses, digging into his wallet for a few dollars, then, meeting the person’s gaze, asks, “Are you alright? Is there anything else you need?” The shift in action and the new empathetic dialogue demonstrate the change more powerfully than a simple statement.
By committing to showing, you transform your characters from flat archetypes into living, breathing individuals. You invite your readers into their minds and hearts, creating an emotional resonance that transcends mere words on a page. This dedication to immersion and authentic portrayal is what elevates a good story to a truly unforgettable one.